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When going through training at the Highmark Caring Place, we learned about the grief spiral, and I cannot tell you how relieving it was to have someone put into words, with a visual analogy, of how I have felt over the past 6 years.❤️ We were given this slinky, and explained that initially, grief sits like a closed slinky-blocking your way, clouding everything. The initial blow of grief is devastating, feels unreal and unfair, and truly, like an obstacle you will never get past. The idea of going through stages of grief and passing from one to the next- that’s a myth. Grief is not a linear journey. It’s not something you move past; much like the love you had for your loved one, it will not end, but that does not mean there is not hope. 💗 Grief is simply a part of love. Instead, we move through it in circles and spirals, like the slinky. Sometimes, the spirals and circles are thin- they just kinda hang in the background as you move through life. You can see through them. You are in front of the spiral. And then, just when we think it has found a comfortable place in the background of our lives, it spirals around again to the forefront. It can be something as big as a holiday or anniversary that brings it to the forefront, or even just as simple as smelling something that reminds you of them. Maybe not as intense as that initial spiral that we couldn’t see through, but still really freaking hard. And it is completely NORMAL. We move through these spirals. Grief is a part of us, much like our loved one. Some days are easier than others. We do not need to pathologize grief. Much like the spiral may now be blocking us during a hard time, it will swing back around. And next time we hit that spiral that swings to the front, it may be slightly less intimidating. We have a little more hope knowing we have been here before, and this is just a part of grief. ❤️ Grief is painful, but allowing yourself to feel this can lead to healing and hope. 💗 . . . #grieveoutloud #griefshare #grievingdaughter #griefsupport #griefawareness #theimperfectholiday #holidaygrief #christmasgrief

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Am I the only one? Drop a 💙 if you feel me

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Mama, When it was still close to the time of your passing, I liked to imagine I would write a letter to you every day and in the end, when I died, I'd have this perfect account of all the ways I missed you and all the little heartbreaks and joys that had transpired since you died. But I didn't. I wrote a lot, I never stopped writing actually, but I stopped writing to you. In some ways, it's because I started to feel you everywhere. You know that old joke that we’re all just afraid we’re going to become our mothers? I mean, I feel like I actually just am you, no way around it. This year will be 11 years, 11! It feels impossible that you could be gone so long. The thing that always gets me is that I cannot remember the sound of your voice. I can't remember your laugh, I don't know why? I can feel your hands, your body, your hair, but your voice, it's the hardest. I wish I could hear you laugh because maybe then I could remember what it was like to be happy with you, not just to be with you in death. I can't remember your laugh and these days I've given up trying to imagine what you'd say to me if I told you all the things that have happened in my life since you left. I've given up trying to imagine what you might think of me. Even though I was 24, I was so far from adult. I thought I knew so much then and really I just knew maybe two things. I knew how to love you and I knew how to have my heart broken. And then I learned about how to lose it all. I think too, about the fast path to becoming, to individuating. The ways in which your absence allowed me to find myself, maybe faster than I would have if I'd still been tucking myself into the comfort of your lap. I think about all the ways your absence Hardened me. I wonder if the tissue of my heart muscle changed. Can a heart change shape? I think mine did {full transcript of letter up on the website}

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These soul collages were created by participants during the recent week-long retreat I led in Hawaii— each of us exploring our own unique expression with these collages as we deepened into healing ourselves and healing Mother Earth. 🌎✨

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Are you loving or loathing the upcoming Christmas season?🎄❤️💭. . For many of us, the holiday season may be a sensitive time as we remember our loved ones who are no longer w/ us😞💔. . BUT this can also give us an opportunity to look back & enjoy our special memories w/ our loved ones too!☺️✨🥰. . Check out Episode 1 of #BGPChristmas!❤️✨🎄. . A special movie w/ friends from Bermuda & across the U.S. sharing our favourite holiday memories! You can watch the full Episode on our IGTV or on our YouTube channel (link in bio). Enjoy! ❤️🎄. . . . . . #BGPLife #BigGirlPantiesLife #BGPChristmas #LosingMom #HolidaySeason #Loss #GrievingDaughter #Memories

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Do you feel like you're going through the motions? You could stop. It's okay to take time off, to sit with yourself or to leave yourself behind and travel. It may feel irresponsible but try prioritizing the things that bring meaning, not control. See what you can leave behind without losing yourself. • • • • • • • • • • • Photograph by Yuriko Takagi for Issey Miyake (SS 1984) • • • • • • • • • • • #grief #griefjourney #griefandloss #loss #griefsupport #griefrecovery #griefawareness #cluboflostdaughters

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Today P is for Patience. I've learned through my own grief that a lot of this journey requires patience. Sometimes we feel that things will be better in x amount of time. I'm here to tell you that Patience is critical to the grief game because it doesn't just go away. It grows with us and goes with us wherever we go. It meets us where we are and demands our attention. Patience.... Patience to endure the dark nights and the sad days . Patience to understand that even those who are not understanding of our pain still mean well . Patience to get to our next right choice . Patience to figure out life without our person . Patience to navigate the complexity of simple tasks mixed with grief attacks and triggers . Patience to be a parent and a spouse and a child and a human while grieving because the everyday is so hard and the only way out is through. . . I hope you can be patient with yourself during your grief journey. . . . What is your P? . . . #abcsofgrief

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Does a change of scenery help you reset? Whether a quick weekend road trip or a flight to visit friends or family, traveling may help you reset.

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Making efforts to remember the love in the loss. A shift in perspective for a moment even can be relieving. This hard. This is wrong. This hurts beyond comprehension. But the grief is in direct correlation to the love. And aren’t we lucky? To have loved and to continue to love someone so much? #grief #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefsupport #griefsucks #griefawareness #griefrecovery #griefrevolution #griefandthemoderngirl #citizengriefpodcast #citizengrief #podcast #siblingloss #loss #griefquotes

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A year ago, Zoey hung out with Santa and had this cute shot, her yearly Christmas photo snapped. The three of us (Zoey, my husband & me) were excited for Christmas...no surprise there, we’re always stoked for Christmas! Zoey was nine-years-old, happy and healthy, albeit recovering from routine surgery to repair the torn ACL in her left back leg. The therapy exercises were tough & time consuming, but we got the hang of them and were making great progress. ❤️ Fast forward a year to the day and our little family of three has been unexpectedly reduced to two. There was no need to visit Santa today or buy Zoey presents (truth be told, I already had earlier this year...they’re still waiting with tags attached in our closet). It’s no surprise that we’re missing Zoey and our old life as a trio, and nothing—not even our time here in London, seeing the lights and tinsel—is boosting our spirits all that much. We’re trying to find moments of levity (and we have, thankfully), but they’ve been fleeting and our normal excitement for London on this, our first holiday together in 18 months, is nowhere to be found. Grief doesn’t take a holiday, unfortunately...even when you do. x 🐾 🐾 #authorslife #petparent #petloss #griefandloss #griefsucks #normalizegrief #griefawareness #petmum #dogmum #dogmom #griefjourney #missyou #griefislove #schipperkelove #loveofmylife #brokenheart

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Through generous donors like you, our agency provides charity care and community service benefits to vulnerable patients. From the dying veteran requiring inpatient hospice care to survivors of suicide who need grief support, the “Give Where You Live” campaign gives hope to individuals and families when they need it most. With your help, over $160,000 has been raised this year — the highest amount ever. Thank you!⁠⁣ ⁠⁣ To make a gift to support charity care and community service benefits, contact [email protected] or 360.597.0717. You can also visit the link in our profile and select "Give Where You Live Campaign 2019" in the drop down menu. ⁠⁣ ⁠⁣ #healthcare #giving #nonprofit #donation #care #love #education #life #mentalhealth #griefsupport #recovery #family #seniorliving #community #CommunityHomeHealthAndHospice #grief #loss #griefjourney #lifeafterloss #grieving #griefrecovery #griefawareness #hope #selfcare #mourning #bereavement #VancouverWA #LongviewWA #WashingtonState #GiveWhereYouLive

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Seeing everyones Christmassy random acts of kindness posts has really hit a nerve with me sooooo I decided that I would join in. This weekend has been hellish to the point I just couldn’t take anymore and I’ve had so many messages from you lovely lot, it’s been amazing that people who don’t even know what I look like have went out their way to see how I was. Writing out these cards for people to find really has helped improve my mood and I hope it helps bring a smile to some faces. So today I bought the least Christmassy cards I could find (in truth the only cards/festive item I’ve bought) some will have encouraging quotes in and some will have a little gift. I hope that if someone is having a tough festive time that they find one of my cards. . . I am not posting this here for some sort of pat on the back but to say thank you to every one of you who have been kind to me despite barely knowing me, you guys have inspired this. I want to pay that kindness forward in a small way. . . So here is the first and only one I will share on here. To the person who find it, enjoy 💗 . . #motherlessdaughters #motherless #lossofaparent #parentless #adultorphan #grief #griefsupport #griefjourney #griefawareness #griefandloss #griefsupportglasgow #griefsucks #christmasishard #christmasrandomactsofkindness #randomactsofkindness #glasgowbloggers #griefcommunity #onlinesupport

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Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom. Victor Frankl Man’s search for Meaning 📖 📚 His book 🙏 . . . Love goes very far beyond the physical person of the beloved. It finds its deepest meaning in his spiritual being, his inner self. Whether or not he is actually present, whether or not he is still alive at all, ceases somehow to be of importance. . . . #selflove #selfcare #selfhealers #gratitude #griefsupport #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefquotes #griefawareness #grieving #childloss #lossofalovedone #mentalhealthawareness #chronicillness #healingjourney #meditation #positivity #yoga #reiki #crystals #mindfulness #higherself #writeyourheartout #inspirationalquotes #motivationalquotes #spiritualawakening #enlightenment #griefhealers #spirituality #thanatology

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Blessings When you are counting down each day towards a Christmas normally full of joy But feel sadder and sadder with each opening of the advent calendar When you open presents beautifully wrapped under your tree But know Santa wont bring you the one gift you really want this year When your stomach is full from eating a Turkey with all the trimmings But you feel empty because someone is missing from the dining table When the clock strikes 12 on new years eve and you welcome the end of a terrible year, But your heart is heavy knowing you will not share a minute of the new one with the person you have lost Know that tears from faces you have never seen will be shed together, invisible hands will hold yours, a rope of strength will connect us all. Together we feel deep grief, because together we have deep love and collectively we radiate something powerful out from the world and share in all that it is to be human. #griefjourney #grief #babylossmamas #babyloss #stillbirth #neonatalloss #strongertogether #griefawareness #loveandloss

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Conscious breathing is a term for medical and therapeutic methods that improve the breathing function. These methods involve directing awareness to breathing and developing habits that improve respiration. Human respiration is controlled consciously or unconsciously. . . . 4-7-8 Technique: To use the 4-7-8 technique, focus on the following breathing pattern: ... breathe in quietly through the nose for 4 seconds. hold the breath for a count of 7 seconds. exhale forcefully through the mouth, pursing the lips and making a "whoosh" sound, for 8 seconds. repeat the cycle up to 4 times. . . . Before starting the breathing pattern, adopt a comfortable sitting position and place the tip of the tongue on the tissue right behind the top front teeth. To use the 4-7-8 technique, focus on the following breathing pattern: •empty the lungs of air •breathe in quietly through the nose for 4 seconds •hold the breath for a count of 7 seconds exhale forcefully through the mouth, pursing the lips and making a "whoosh" sound, for 8 seconds •repeat the cycle up to 4 times . . . #selflove #selfcare #selfhealers #gratitude #griefsupport #griefandloss #griefjourney #griefquotes #griefawareness #grieving #childloss #lossofalovedone #mentalhealthawareness #chronicillness #healingjourney #meditation #positivity #yoga #reiki #crystals #mindfulness #higherself #writeyourheartout #inspirationalquotes #motivationalquotes #spiritualawakening #enlightenment #griefhealers #spirituality #thanatology

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